I have been keeping things for myself and have been denying the fact that I have loads of hurtings in my heart. For those who do not know and may be interested to know, I left for London almost 2 years ago. I flew in London, 24th of October and there.. I faced the challenge of my life that will never be forgotten.
When I was in my teenage years, I don't really know why but at the back of my head, I know someday, somehow, by any means, I would be stepping to the land where I've always dreamed of.. England. Oh maybe I was influenced by the childhood story of 'The Little Princess' or as many would know, 'Sara, ang Munting Prinsesa'. It was a story of a poor girl who lived in London not knowingly... (and I have been pressing the backspace several times reminiscing the story of this movie but I couldn't recall anymore! hahah!) Basically it's the setting or the location of the movie that really marked my mind since I was small. Sometimes, I see myself like Sara. She too walked along the streets with thick snow underdressed, ate loaves as a meal and to be honest, I have been short of money for a couple of times.
I may say for the first few months in London, I was full of excitement. I was eager to learn new things the English way. I wanted to go out and roam around the city just to see things for myself and say, 'This was once my dream and now, I am standing here.' I have been observing these English people live life in style. The have a very elegant taste of fashion that yes, I will admit, I could never afford. I was not born rich but I am proud to say that I am BLESSED. I stare and give glare and even try to speak in their accent. Funny to see myself trying so hard twisting my tongue and doing the English intonation in my voice. Mind you, you would see yourself doing this when you travel alot. And now I'm sitting in the couch here in my big brother.s place in Kuala Lumpur, I can make this blog sound like a Malay version of my life.. Boleh!?
Just when I am so in the mood to finish my London life in one sitting, my cousin Ate Mi who is more of like a big sister to me popped a message at Facebook asking me about something. arrgghh, destructions are part of life. *clicks the 'Go Offline' button*
So there, much of me wanting to wipe out the whole page of non-stop smiles and cries of my London life, I'm out of focus. Words have been tossing in my mind, stories, cries, bloopers, and all the little things cannot be contained in one blank page, one blog. This is to begin the chapter where I, until now, have been fiddling about myself the purpose of my existence.
1 kiss for this blog *JCL*
